Dear Brain

Dear Brain,

Life often takes drastic turns. At times we may not know what is ahead. I have found solace in following your lead, confident that we are capable of facing whatever challenges may lie ahead. I look forward to spending an eternity with you. A compliment of you is what I strive to be. I am confident that we will live together for an indefinitely long time. Why?

I love you. I love you in every sense of the word. I love you with warm and personal affection. I love you as a dear family member. I love you romantically. Most of all I love you with the strongest form of love, a love that is an unselfish concern for doing what is right and good, whether it appears to be deserved or not. It is a love that covers mistakes. It provides the basis for “putting up with one another and forgiving one another freely.” Granted we all make mistakes, but this love allows us to forgive. This kind of love never fails. It is a perfect bond.

I deeply respect you. I want to honor you by being kind to you, respectful of your dignity and expressed views, and ready to fulfill any reasonable request made of me. I want to show my deep respect by considering what is best for you and giving that priority. I understand and accept that we may not always agree. It would be unreasonable to expect us to have identical opinions and views on everything. However, I do respect your views and opinions. I want to show my respect for your dignity as well by not making you the object of demeaning jokes or comments.

Because of the love and deep respect I have for you, I feel we can overcome any obstacles that may lie ahead. I feel we can have a happy future together, forever. There are many things I need to work on, many things I want to do but have yet to accomplish. I really need to work at communicating. Good communication flourishes when there are gently spoken words, gracious looks and gestures, kindness, understanding, and tenderness. I know I have failed at times to be understanding and to speak gently and for this I am truly sorry. While learned behavior is not an excuse for me to act in such a way, it may assist you in understanding. There are many personality traits I need to improve on. I find more and more aspects of my personality that need improvement each day. Please be patient with me as I try to make these improvements.

I am trying. I am trying to do what you need me to do. I am being patient but I must admit I am confused and slightly frustrated when my efforts to provide you with, what I believe to be, what you need are met with a less than positive reaction. At times I feel no matter what I do, or how, I am only going to succeed in causing you pain. I am being patient, and will continue in my patience, hoping to gain understanding in time.

I am learning to keep your interests first. You think this cannot be learned, I disagree. I have lived the majority of my life putting the needs of others first. However, for self-preservation I began putting myself first in order to avoid extreme pain and heartache. I had been trampled and beaten so often that in order to save myself from more harm I needed to put my interests first. I know I am capable of putting your needs, wants, and desires first and foremost. I know because it was a challenge to make myself less selfless and more selfish. I do love you and trust you completely. I need to recondition myself and readjust my thinking. I know you will not cause me any intentional harm. This knowledge allows me to make myself vulnerable again. I am able but most of all I truly desire to look out for your best interests instead of my own.

I love you sincerely, without reservation. I respect you deeply.

I miss you.

With all my love,

Heart