Friday, November 12, 2010

a letter to an eighteen year old me

Dear Younger Self,

It’s hard to write a letter to you, because I think my twenty six year old version needs an Older Me to guide me and bathe me in her wisdom―assuming she has some. I’ll certainly give this advice thing my best shot, but as they say (who are “they,” anyway?), take it with a grain of salt.

1. When a man poops openly with the door open while you’re together on date number four, do not marry him. Do not even finish the date with him. At this point in your life, you think it’s very evolved of him to be uninhibited about his bodily functions, but let me tell you, Younger Me, it’s not evolved―it’s just plain weird.

2. Seeing Makati, Metro Manila, is not seeing the world. Who told you that you had to figure out your career at twenty-one? Oh, right … your parents. Love them, but they were wrong about that. Go places. Do things. Meet people. Make a career out of it if you can. Because otherwise, you’re going to be sitting at a desk all day with only fifteen days a year to satisfy your wanderlust. So go―maybe to Thailand first―and lick some lemon off one of those hot, traveling Aussies’ asses, then do a shot of tequila and jump off some crazy-high cliff into the clear blue water, just like Leo DiCaprio did in The Beach. It will make you smile one day when you’re sitting under fluorescent office lighting.

3. Keep practicing your French. And your French kissing. Or maybe learn a new language. One day, you might want to bug out to a different country, and you’ll be a lot more marketable if you can actually speak a language other than Southern high-school Taglish.

4. Doritos and French onion dip are the devil. Just like the one all those Southern Baptist preachers warned you about. I know, they taste so good when they hit your lips, but your body hurts after eating them. And one day, you’ll accidentally fart in an elevator in front of a complete stranger. You’ll be mortified and it will smell bad, Younger Me. No amount of junk-food pleasure is worth that embarrassment. On that note …

5. You’re not fat. Well, actually, sometimes you sort of are … so do something about it when you chunk up! Start exercising regularly now, instead of waiting ten more years; you’ll feel so much better about yourself and have so much more confidence. You could use a little. Which makes me feel really bad about saying this …

6. That layered haircut makes you look like a soccer mom, not a fresh eighteen year old who should be out meeting and making out with hot guys and letting them grope your breasts. Seriously, Younger Me. That’s a really bad look.

7. Channel Stuart Smalley. You’re good enough, you’re smart enough, and doggone it, people really do like you. Stop worrying so much about what other people think, because they aren’t thinking about you nearly as much as you worry they are. Everyone has his or her own shit to deal with, so just be yourself and do your thing.

8. Tell the people who matter that they matter, and tell them all the time. You’re decent at this, Younger Me, but do it a little more. Because when the day comes when they’re not around anymore (and it’s coming), you’ll always replay the last conversation you had with them, so make sure it’s a good one.

9. Carpe diem. Like, really seize it. Grab that day by the balls and don’t let go. Just go for it, Younger Me! With a man, that is. You never go for it. Ever. What are you so afraid of? If you’re not careful, you’ll marry the inappropriate pooper and spend most of your days reeling from a separation. The Beatles weren’t wrong; all you need is love. Now go show off your awsomeness (but please tone it up first) in something tight and pleather.

Lots of love to you, hot stuff.

ME :)

Monday, November 8, 2010

One Year Older (A Birthday Wish)

Wednesday is my 26th birthday, so I decided to interrupt work with some appreciation of my own. A lot has changed in the past year or so, for better and worse. Change has touched every aspect of my life, from family and friends, to where I live and work. It’s been a year of anger, sadness, fear and pain, but it’s also been a year of new beginnings, happiness and love. I’ve discovered that life isn’t fair. Bad things happen to good people. Sometimes a lot of bad things happen at once. There will be times when we feel like the whole world is against us, and things can’t possibly get any worse…and then they will. But, the thing is, there’s always someone, somewhere, who is worse off than we are, as hard as that may be to believe. Putting things in perspective is incredibly powerful.

All of this change has caused me to change as well. I’ve learned that we have two choices when it comes to facing life’s obstacles: let them defeat you, or take the opportunity to learn and grow. Although I didn’t realize it at the time, the most difficult experiences of the past year have taught me a lot about myself and made me appreciate all that I have.

For quite a while, I wasn’t sure where I wanted to go with the rest of this post. I probably re-wrote it half a dozen times, unsure of what message I wanted to get across. I was going to list all of the people and things that I appreciate, but I believe that appreciation is something that should be part of our everyday lives. It’s not just for special days like birthdays, and it shouldn’t take a tragic event to motivate us to take a step back and be grateful.

If you take nothing else away from the Appreciation Revolution, I hope you realize that life is a precious gift. It is beautiful and fulfilling, frustrating and exciting, but it is also unpredictable. So, make every moment count, and don’t take anything or anyone for granted. Stop making excuses. Say things like ‘thank you,’ ‘I love you,’ ‘I appreciate your hard work,’ and ‘You mean so much to me.’ It is my hope that The Appreciation Revolution will not end when the last post goes up, but will continue to live on through all of you.

When I close my eyes and prepare to blow out the candles on my birthday cake, I won’t just be making a wish. I’ll be taking a moment to appreciate my life, and all of the wonderful, beautiful, people and things that make it all worthwhile.

In case you were wondering…

I'm a sucker for sweets! :)

Thursday, November 4, 2010

REPOST: CEO of J.P Morgan Fantastic reply to a Pretty Girl

MINDBLOWING THOUGHT PROCESS!!!

A young and pretty lady posted this on a popular forum:

Title: What should I do to marry a rich guy?

I'm going to be honest of what I'm going to say here. I'm 25 this year. I'm very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above. You might say that I'm greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York. My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married?

I wanted to ask:
what should I do to marry rich persons like you? Among those I've dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit. If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of New York CityGarden(?), $250k annual income is not enough.

I'm here humbly to ask a few questions:
Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)
Which age group should I target?
Why most wives of the riches is only average-looking? I've met a few girls who doesn't have looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys.
How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your girlfriend? My target now is to get married)

Ms. Pretty


Awesome reply:

Dear Ms. Pretty,

I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours.
Please allow me to analyse your situation as a professional investor. My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I'm not wasting time here.

From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain. Put the details aside, what you're trying to do is an exchange of "beauty" and "money": Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square.

However, there's a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can't be prettier year after year. Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It's not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worried 10 years later. By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a "trading position". If the trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long term - same goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or "leased".

Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income. This has better chance than finding a rich fool.

Hope this reply helps. If you are interested in "leasing" services, do contact me...

signed,
J.P. Morgan