heart's dilemma

It hits you when you least expect it. You think you’re all in control, but then it hits like a bad car accident. What do you do when your heart aches with unbreathable pain? Who can you talk to? Where do you go? How do you live on when half your body isn’t working properly? Too shamed to tell, too weak to lie. It’s a deep hollow pain that no one or nothing can help rid the pain. You feel like an abandoned baby left on somebody’s doorstep or worse, dumped in a trash bin. Betrayal, no matter if it’s intentional or unintentional, how do you recover? I’m not going to hold back on this subject because from life experience it teaches us to trust, your human nature wants you to trust but when that trust is breached it can be devastating. No matter how loyal or disloyal you are, it can happen to anyone because it comes a time in your life, you let your defenses down and you get relaxed or distracted and when you are not looking, BAM, it comes from out of nowhere and hits you on your blind side. You ask the Lord to help you take each breath. You accuse yourself of faults of your own and pick yourself apart like a hungry buzzard picking fresh dead meat, until you realize it’s the insecurity of the betrayer; it’s not you. The process of recovery is slow. And believe me you will recover, but only with time and rediscovery of self. We can be so naive when it comes to love.

Any and everybody, when that need of love comes, the gamble begins. You open your heart wider and wider to let love see your inner soul. The more you let love see, the more you want love to see. And you share the vision with someone who sees and understand how your love looks. This is a precious gift to let someone witness and you have to do it with the upmost care. Because if you give that love to someone that doesn’t recognize it the way you do, you can get hurt. First you got to know love of self before you can see love of others. And if a person has never seen love, how will one recognize something0 he/she never saw or had. Protect your heart and it will protect you.

Love Yourself..