Things that make life worth living

Have you ever had one of those moments? You know the really good ones where you are completely content and know that all is right with the world?

It was one day when you were holding your son or daughter and felt so full of love that you felt like you would burst;

Or it was hearing the perfect words come from the person who actually is perfect for you;

It was the contentment that can come from walking along the river holding hands and being together;

It could have been the day you felt you were bursting with pride to have that person with you so everyone would know they were yours – and you were theirs;

It was sitting on a log in the forest listening to the world around you;

It was sitting on the beach with a mai tai listening to the waves crash;
Or laughing so hard at the cutest thing that your child inadvertently said;

It was getting a second chance;

It was drifting off to sleep next to the one you adore and hearing “I love you” just as you start floating away, taking the knowledge of being loved into your dreams;

It was talking all night with an old friend;

Or finishing the last sentence of the best book you ever read and flipping immediately to the beginning and starting it all over again;

It was hearing someone you respect say they are proud of you;

Or singing in the shower;

Finishing your crossword puzzle all by yourself;

Or learning something new – just because you want to;

It was watching two of your favorite people connect;

Or it was waking up from a wonderful dream and realizing that you are lying next to the reason it was so wonderful;

The day you gave that big speech or presentation and received recognition from your boss and co-workers for a job well done;

It was a nap on the couch - in his arms, or with her in yours;

It was the day you got on the scale and realized you no longer had to worry about those stubborn last 12 pounds because they were gone;

It was buying your dream home;

Or having coffee in bed on a Saturday morning;

It was making someone you love breakfast in bed as a surprise;

It was the day you got your first real job;

Or bought your first car;

It was seeing him or her across the room and thinking, “this has potential;”

The day you found out you were having your first child – and they first day you held him;

Being able to buy your parents something they would never buy themselves but would greatly appreciate – and doing it just because you can;

Knowing you thrill him/her;

The moment they handed you the diploma;

Going away together for the very first time;

Or dancing with your little ones in the kitchen while you make dinner;

Hearing your child laugh uncontrollably;

Or being able to come up with the exact right thing to say in a situation and being able to say it exactly how you mean it;

Laughing till you cry;

Feeling like he thinks you are beautiful;

Sleeping in on a rainy Saturday;

Or a big bowl or tasty soup on a cold night;

Falling in love – and knowing this is the last time…

Maybe it was every one of these things. Or maybe for you it was something completely different. Regardless, you need to hold on to those moments. Make them count. Realize they are precious and keep them tucked away in your heart. These are the things life is made of. It is not where you live or how much is in your bank account. It is not what you drive or having the right outfit. It is the intangible things that make life worth living. And so far, that is the most important lesson I have learned.

tales of the broken hearted

Heal those wounds.. All those who have hurt might have felt this I'm sure.

*Let go when you’re hurting too much. Give up when love isn’t enough and move on when things are not like before. Surely there is someone out there who will love you even more.

*You’ll never find the right person, if you can’t let go of the wrong one.

*Never leave the one you love for the one you like, because the one you like will leave you for the one they love.

*Because he has been a major part of your life, of course you’ll miss him; it’s perfectly normal. It’s like getting a tooth pulled out; after the dentist pulls it out you’re relieved. But how many times does your tongue run itself over the spot where the tooth once was, probably a hundred times a day? Just because it was hurting you does not mean you don’t notice it. It leaves a gap, and sometimes you see yourself missing it terribly. It’s going to take awhile, but it takes time. Should you have kept the tooth? No, because it was causing you pain. Pulling the tooth was the right decision, but it’s going to hurt.

*There’s one thing I have to say so I’ll be brave. You were what I wanted. I gave what I gave. I’m not sorry I met you. I’m not sorry it’s over. I’m not sorry there’s nothing to save.

*There were times when he caught me, but there were more times he let me fall and finally it came time for me to learn that I could pick myself up off the ground, and walk away ...

*Eventually one of two things will happen: He’ll realize you’re worth it or you’ll realize he isn’t.

*I guess it’s gonna have to hurt, I guess I’m gonna have to cry; and let go of some things I’ve loved, to get to the other side. I guess it’s gonna break me down, like falling when you try to fly; it’s sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life, starts with goodbye.

*So go on, make your little getaway. My pride will keep me company and you just gave yours all away. Now I’m gonna dress myself for two: once for me and once for someone new. I’m gonna do some things you wouldn’t let me do. Oh … I’m gonna find another you.

*When you’re dreaming with a broken heart, the waking up is the hardest part.

*She’s standing on a line between giving up and seeing how much more she can take.

*My heart didn’t break into a thousand pieces after he left. Instead, I realized all the things he didn’t do. He didn’t want to hear my stories. He didn’t ask me questions. He didn’t smile when I was talking to him. He didn’t hug me out of the blue to make me feel good. His hugs were always a preamble to something else and after he was gone, I wondered if he ever knew me at all …

*Just because a friendship or relationship ends does not mean that the other person is a bad person. Nor does it mean that the other person is crazy. Nor does it mean that the other person never cared about you or any of those things we often say. It simply means that it wasn’t meant to work out and though it is horrible and unfortunate and sometimes heartbreaking, it’s not the end of the world. Other friends will come along, other boyfriends and girlfriends will come along. Sometimes things just aren’t meant to be. And that has to be okay. It has to be okay because otherwise what do we have?


from the author:

We can never appreciate happiness unless we have experienced to be hurt. Consider all these past hurts blessings. It what makes us stronger.

heart's dilemma

It hits you when you least expect it. You think you’re all in control, but then it hits like a bad car accident. What do you do when your heart aches with unbreathable pain? Who can you talk to? Where do you go? How do you live on when half your body isn’t working properly? Too shamed to tell, too weak to lie. It’s a deep hollow pain that no one or nothing can help rid the pain. You feel like an abandoned baby left on somebody’s doorstep or worse, dumped in a trash bin. Betrayal, no matter if it’s intentional or unintentional, how do you recover? I’m not going to hold back on this subject because from life experience it teaches us to trust, your human nature wants you to trust but when that trust is breached it can be devastating. No matter how loyal or disloyal you are, it can happen to anyone because it comes a time in your life, you let your defenses down and you get relaxed or distracted and when you are not looking, BAM, it comes from out of nowhere and hits you on your blind side. You ask the Lord to help you take each breath. You accuse yourself of faults of your own and pick yourself apart like a hungry buzzard picking fresh dead meat, until you realize it’s the insecurity of the betrayer; it’s not you. The process of recovery is slow. And believe me you will recover, but only with time and rediscovery of self. We can be so naive when it comes to love.

Any and everybody, when that need of love comes, the gamble begins. You open your heart wider and wider to let love see your inner soul. The more you let love see, the more you want love to see. And you share the vision with someone who sees and understand how your love looks. This is a precious gift to let someone witness and you have to do it with the upmost care. Because if you give that love to someone that doesn’t recognize it the way you do, you can get hurt. First you got to know love of self before you can see love of others. And if a person has never seen love, how will one recognize something0 he/she never saw or had. Protect your heart and it will protect you.

Love Yourself..

i love you.. .

I’ve been with this man that makes me feel so in love and so infuriated all at the same time. We have developed a pattern where we are extremely happy and can’t get enough of each other and as time goes by, I’m pulling away. I know now that it’s me pulling away because I know deep down, he’s not the guy I expected to end up with. So, traumatized of being committed to the wrong guy, I run away. My problem is I can’t last a week before I miss him and I want him back in my life.

My friends say I’m addicted to the drama. Who’s to say? There are so many wrongs in my relationship that sometimes I have a hard time remembering why I love this man... until I’m standing in front of him, hugging him, kissing him, laughing with him. I know I could spend the rest of my life with this guy and we would have fun together.

My concerns run the game out from his bachelor lifestyle (lack of responsibility) to his conspiracy theories, to his selfish nature (he needs to receive in order to give; imagine an invisible score-card tracking his every move), to his bad habits, to his uncontrollable spending (because he can’t save, I don’t know if I’ll ever accomplish my dreams of traveling the world), to his laziness and lack of motivation.

With all of the problems, no matter how many times I walk away, I always come back to him. When we’re “making up,” I feel a love that I’ve never felt before in my life. We’ve discussed everything until we’re blue in the face. He’s acknowledged that he takes me for granted. He agrees that he should work on some of his more disgusting habits. He knows he needs to be more responsible and pay his bills on time and start a savings account. When I’m with him, I manage to motivate him, but when I’m not there, he loses that focus and I can’t hold his hand for him.

I’m twenty-six years old, I’m not at all worried about a biological clock ticking to fulfill all my dreams. My dream is to live happy and finding companionship with that special someone. I can’t imagine myself without this man in my life. I want to walk in the parks with him, have longer walks on a beach, have picnics, hold hands, and do all the things I’ve loved doing with him.

I talk to friends, young and old, and I can see that people have overcome bigger problems than mine. I’ve analyzed this relationship to death and maybe it’s not as perfect as I’ve imagined in my dreams and maybe there are other men out there that will have all the qualities that I want in a man. But I love this man. I want my future to be with this man.

You always hear “life is short.” Doesn’t that mean to enjoy life with what you have in front of you and to stop imagining that the grass is greener elsewhere?

So maybe he’s not perfect and maybe we have an uphill battle in front of us, but when I feel the love I feel with him and when I watch him take baby steps to try to make me the happiest girl alive, I know in my heart that this can work and that I’m not wasting my time. And if I do make it to the point where I’m spending the rst of my life with this man, I will know that every argument and every everytime I spent apart from him was worth it to make it to that moment.

one wish

I’ve spent the past few days wishing for many things. And right there, out of the box, is the crux of it. I’ve been wishing.

My most common wish is that I’ll make something out of myself, that someday my work will mean something and that my writing will go somewhere. I keep wishing to accomplish something. I keep wishing for my life to get better. I just keep wishing. It’s not that I don’t really want it, or that I don’t want to put in effort; I’m not being lazy. I simply don’t know what else to do.

Today’s wish was to disappear. To be selfish enough to not care and to just go. I was on my way to work and I wanted to just keep on driving. I didn’t want to do my job or go back home, I just wanted to keep going. I wanted to keep on going until my cab broke or ran out of gas, and then I would start walking and just keep going until I fell down. I wanted to go until the path ended and then some. Just keep walking into the places where no one else was until all I can hear is the chirp of a bird or wind passing through the landscape, or the landscape itself. Just go until all I can feel is the Earth beneath my feet and the sun on my skin. To sit on a side and let the wind blow me to pieces like a pile of sand and simply not be me anymore.

I want to be free of all my “responsibilities” and social chains. I don’t want to go “home,” to that house I paid way too much for to and found out it’s going to take even more to fix. I don’t want to go to that place that just serves as a reminder of every thing that’s gone wrong, of everything I wanted and allowed myself to be talked out of, of everything I didn’t want and allowed myself to be talked into

This is not the life I wished for. This is not the life I wanted. This is not the life I worked for. Haven’t I dealt with enough yet? Haven’t I slogged through enough bullshit, emotional turmoil, financial crap, and general cruddiness? What more must I go through before I can find peace? What more must happen?

I don’t suppose this is healthy, this wishing to be someone else, somewhere else. Is it normal to wish to be free of all ties? To just be able to go about and do whatever the hell you want?

Why can’t I go do whatever for a week at time? Why do I have to be responsible and care about my credit and paying my bills? What the hell good did it do me? Yay, I have two degrees. Who cares? What good has it done me? None. All I’ve got to show for it is years of stress and malnutrition and debt that’s going to follow me for the next ten years.

I was hoping that writing all this down would make me feel better somehow, but I think I’m only embroiling myself further.

I’m afraid that I’ll never amount to anything, that I’ll slip away from the world but still be stuck in it. So isolated but never free. That I’ll become this hermit who’s life flies by without her. I’m half way through it aren’t I? The part of my life that’s supposed to be so fun and care free? Well, I’m still waiting for the fun part ...