A Happy Ever After

We’ve all heard the stories, often beginning with “Once upon a time” and ending with “happily ever after”, stories that are often a part of every child’s life, including mine.  Yet one must not forget the middle, without the middle there is no “Once upon a time” or “happily ever after”, the lessons of the middle are more than just words on paper or a simple child’s fairy tale, they contain lessons that we can all learn from if put into practice in our lives.

Beware the evil queen and her huntsman, she can’t handle the truth and often uses her huntsman to do her evil deeds. She’ll never put others first yet will do whatever it takes to put herself first, on a pedestal she does not deserve.  The only bright spot is that at times some of the huntsmen may see the light and despite the cost, despite the danger, their good shines through.

Surround yourself with people who love you, who will protect you, as the seven dwarves surrounded Snow White. Keep in mind we are all different and each of us will bring a different quality to the table. Remember happiness is not measured by where you dwell, the smallest cottage may contain more love and warmth than the grandest castle.

Remember if something is too good to be true, the price in the long run may be too costly, the consequences of making a deal with Rumpelstiltskin is no deal at all.

No matter how badly the wicked stepmother and step-sisters treat us it does not justify our behavior imitating theirs. Treat people how you want to be treated, with kindness and respect (when earned).

At times there may be more than just a pea keeping you awake at night. The choices you make, the consequences you accept, will set you free as long as your choices are made with no what if’s and you let honesty be your biggest motivator. Nothing is ever gained from lying.

Following the Pied Piper blindly can have devastating consequences, there are always two sides to a story and accepting anything at face value without all the facts may lead you away from what you truly love and believe in.  Consider the collateral damage; your actions may not just impact you but the ones you love.

What’s on the outside isn’t always an accurate measure of what’s on the inside, as demonstrated by the Emperor. Listen to the voice of innocence because it will not tell you what you want to hear but what is true because a lie will always be a lie and has no value.

The Frog-Prince taught us the value of keeping one’s word, promises should never be broken and once again what one sees on the outside isn’t always what’s on the inside. Beauty is more than skin deep; let your inner beauty shine.

Greed (a selfish and excessive desire for more of something than is needed) never results in good, Ali Baba’s brother and the forty thieves paid the ultimate price for their greed. When your purpose is not pure, when selfishness and a since of entitlement outweigh what you’ve earned, or deserve, there may not be a happily ever after.

Just like the boy who cried wolf lying has its consequences, if you always lie, when you tell the truth nobody will listen.

You don’t always need someone else to rescue you; you don’t need to be a damsel in distress waiting for Prince Charming or a fairy godmother to make everything right.  For the most part you will be able to rescue yourself simply by the choices you make.

Think of others first, in doing so you may reap more than you desire. Pay it forward as the Elves and the Shoemaker did, one good deed does deserve another.

And most importantly, realize that “happily ever after” doesn’t just happen, every day we make choices that have an impact on our happily ever after. Keep an open mind, realize that my happily ever after may not be the same as your happily ever after. It’s critical that one does not lose sight of what they do have over what they desire to have, as they say, “A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.” Make the choices that will add more than just monetary value to your life, and when it’s all said and done become a hero, not a villain.

the most cliché thing in life is YOU! :)

Sometimes it’s easy to feel like you’re the only one in the world who’s struggling, who’s frustrated, or unsatisfied, or barely getting by. But that feeling is a lie. And if you just hold on and find the courage and patience to face it all for another day, then in God’s time, not yours, someone or something will find you and make it all okay. Because we all need a little help sometimes and that’s a fact. Someone to help us hear the music in our world. Someone to remind us that it won’t always be this way, that it won’t always be dark cloudy skies, the sun will shine too after the rain. That someone is out there patiently waiting and that someone will find you in its own time and purpose.

Life is not easy for any of us. It is a continual challenge and battle of survival and it is up to us to be cheerful and to be strong, so that those who depend on us may draw strength from our example; for the greatest test of courage on earth is to bear defeat without losing your heart. There is always a choice you have to make in everything that you do and you must always keep in mind that the choice you make . . . makes YOU.

Life isn’t a destination, it’s a journey. We all come upon unexpected curves and turning points. Everything that happens to us shapes who we are becoming. And in the adventure of each day, we discover the important things in life and why they are important. We realize that people who come our way have their purpose and that everything happens for a reason.

I believe that we are who we choose to be. Nobody’s going to come and save you, you’ve got to save yourself. You are not a responsibility of others; you are responsible for your own self. Nobody’s going to give you anything; you will work for it and earn the fruit of your labor. You’ve got to go out and fight for it. Nobody knows what you want except for you. And nobody will be as sorry as you are if you don’t get it. You cannot blame others for your failures and frustrations; they are not born in this world to live up to your desires, dreams, and wants in life. Remember always—it’s you who chooses what and where you stand right now. It depends on how you respond with people and situations. Whatever the consequences of your choices, you must be ready to face it all by yourself.

Don’t give up on your dreams. In the end, it’s not the years in our life that counts. It’s the life in our years.

Lessons learned in the past 365 days..

There are not many who understand the weight of this article.

For a year, I’ve thought about the changes in my life . . . the ups and downs . . . and the laterals.

It's not rainbows and butterflies; although the constant nearby chocolate doesn’t hurt.

I’m very lucky to say that, after these past 365 days, I still love love.
I believe that love should be expressed every day, especially the days that it is hard to. If it was easy, everyone would do it.

I believe that every day is an opportunity to love hard and to love well . . . to grow with each other and mature separately . . . and today I believe stronger than I ever have that forgiveness and gratitude are the foundations of true love, not newness and variety.

“Even when love isn’t enough . . . somehow it is.” Was this quote written by a poet, a romantic comedy screenwriter, an author of young adult vampire novels? No. It was written by Steven King. Naturally, only a man who has the ability to strike fear in our hearts in the form of ghosts, supernatural beings, and clowns can put love so simply.

This past year, I’ve learned much.

That being frightened of being hurt again does not allow me to hurt others first.

That honesty is the most prized possession and something that cannot be imitated.

That a midnight chocolate soufflé on Valentine’s Day tastes way better than at any other time of the year.

That Shakespeare was way before his time, and I dare a man today to try to replicate his passion.

That words are powerful weapons. But that our actions cut an even deeper wound.

That friends step up to the plate much more than you ever thought possible.

That comfort can be found in chuck taylors, on a blog, in a stranger’s kind words, in a glass of spakling wine under white Christmas lights, in a surprise gift, in a friend teaching you that tofu is not ALL that bad, and in an old man telling you that “you are the funniest person I have ever met in my seventy-three years on this planet.”

That all it takes is a big security deposit to move into new apartment this year.

That romantic comedies never show you the year (or the day) AFTER the couple falls into each other’s arms. I want to see Katherine Heigl and Butler one year later? Okay, Paramount?

That friends will be brutally honest if just given the platform.

That the ultimate goal of each day should be to be the best version of ourselves possible, and that we should not waste time on the people who decide to be less than they are capable of being.

That midnight is a perfectly acceptable bedtime.

That 7 a.m. is an unacceptable time of the morning.

That a horse’s heart is larger than a human’s, in so many ways.

That true love is a choice and both people have to choose it.

That there are too many good people in this world to spend time on the ones that suck.

That the key to love is finding someone able to love your faults as much as you love theirs.

I could go on and on . . . and have over these past twelve months. You get the gist. You’ve gotten the gist. Long story not quite so short, we deserve the same amount we give. And not one iota less. Jot that down. Let that be a lesson to you.

Happy New Year!